Sunday, 3 November 2019

Just Another Post To Rant

"Either you die a hero or live long enough to see yourself become the villain" 

As I grow older, I get increasingly disappointed in today's society. Just like how Joker turns into a villain because of toxic people who likes 'making fun' of others for their own enjoyment to make themselves feel superior. The movie came to me like a tidal wave because I could understand 100% how he is feeling. Many of times I feel the same, struggling so hard not to turn into a villain like Joker myself. 

Just last night while having dinner, we were chatting about camping on top of a mountain with a caravan and stuff. So I said that I saw a picture of a lodging place which was hanging at the side of a mountain and it was helluva spectacular. (You know, just wanted to share)

Suddenly, they questioned me what is the "side of the mountain" called. FYI, the lodge I was talking about is "dangling" along the side of a mountain & not on the top of it. I remembered coming across a lot of terms for parts of a mountain (like leeward / windward technical names for the sides of a mountain). So I wondered maybe there's a term to call the sides of a mountain which I don't know?

...  And I answered with a "I don't know what it's called". (Drama incoming)

& This was the reaction I received - The look on their faces when they looked at each other thinking 'Joke, this dumb ass don't know such an easy term for this? Lololol.' Oh the amount of schadenfreude I felt. (Don't tell me maybe I am over reacting. The only reason I'm friends with them because they bitch in front of you and not behind your back. They are not two-faced and their expressions shows)

Anyway, so done with dinner at that point. Their actions whetted my appetite & I wasn't n the mood to talk after that. This kind of situation is not often but it's also not the first time either.

Expectations vs. Reality

So I asked what it's called & they proudly proclaimed the side of the mountain is... a "cliff". Wow. Kinda triggered, was thinking that they might have a better term or word for it! 


You can call the top flat ground / edge of a mountain a cliff. But I was talking about the side of a cliff (Aka. the correct answer is called the face of a mountain *Point B*)

For god's sake, I was talking about this. Baffled by their lack of vocabulary but still want to show off and put others down. Stupid me for hoping more from them.

If you said its named a crag aka a steep or rough part of a mountain I would be intrigued because it's new to me. But no, you judged me "dumb" because you (thought) you knew the answer. 

ANYWAY! 

The point is that I don't understand why do people like making other people feel stupid? Do they like being mean? Do they think by doing this they are more "superior" than others? 

All of us has things we seek to know and there are just certain things that we seriously don't bother to remember or care about. Friends should respect one another, and not put others down. Nor should friends look down on others for their lack of knowledge! Putting others down to feel good about yourself is downright low, which speaks a lot about your personality. 

Don't say that it is a joke either, 
because if a joke can make someone else feel bad, 
then it is definitely not a joke per se.

Sometimes, things like this happen to remind me of what I should & never will become. To remind myself don't be like them. Please share knowledge without making someone feel bad, and don't put yourself on such a high pedestal because the higher you are, the harder you fall.

No one likes to be put-down by others. Nothing good to say, don't say. Repeat the correct pronunciation to them instead of "testing" them to say it wrong again. Or better, don't correct them at all because what's the point? Is it so difficult to do this? (He pronounced broth as broof after laughing at my "cliff".) Gosh.

Sigh, the lack of empathy in society today.

Signing off, 
Angel Seah.

Thursday, 19 September 2019

What is Love?

Everyone around me has been asking this question....

"Why don't you go find a boyfriend?"

And I'll always reply with....

"喜欢的不出现,出现的不喜欢"

I've also been telling the people around me that getting a boyfriend has never appeared in my mind. I like being single... I'm comfortable being alone. I rather live a high quality life being single, than be stuck in a bad relationship. 

But honestly, it's actually not the case.... and the truth is, I'm just feel extremely afraid of getting hurt once more and I have no guts to give love another try. Even though I feel that I have gotten over the past relationship, my heart still stings when I think about it. I acknowledge that I have an extremely high expectations for relationships.. and the trauma of countless arguments, being lied to, hearing friends get cheated on, divorce cases, disappointments, being let down, broken promises, expectations vs. reality, I can still remember the pain of my heart shattering, getting depressed, crying everyday, tearing up suddenly, being tired and emotionally drained. 

I am traumatized. I am afraid. What if this happens again?

Somebody save me. But I don't know if I want to be saved. 

Monday, 17 December 2018

SEVENTEEN DIAMOND EDGE EXPERIENCE SINGAPORE ˉ̡̠̭̭”( ⑉¯ །། ¯⑉ )ˉ̡̠̭̭

FREE VIP TICKETS TO DIAMOND EDGE SG

Missing Seventeen so much after Diamond Edge in Bangkok that we decided to buy tickets to DE in Singapore. Didn't want to buy SG's tickets because the concert falls on a Friday plus tickets were more expensive / sold at an exorbitant price...

One day, Chanel sent me a lucky draw contest giving away 10 pairs of VIP Tickets to Seventeen Concert and said "lets start drinking this shit!" haha. All we have to do is order Sjora drink with every meal from any participating outlets to stand a chance to win :D


(Carl's Jr, Burger King, KFC, Pepper Lunch, Popeyes, Texas Chicken and Yoshinoya) 

C : So from tomorrow onwards, we eat this everyday.
C : Remember to take receipt and keep, 1 receipt per meal.
C : Ask everyone to eat this and give us the receipt
C : Hope we are fated to meet them again in SG

This went on for a week and we made all our friends, families and colleagues drink Sjora almost everyday for a week until they got sick of it and Chanel hates fast-foods. BUT THANK GOD IF NOT WE DRINK UNTIL WANT VOMIT ALR UNTIL THE 8TH DAY Chanel received an SMS stating:

Dear Chanel, 

You have been selected as the Week 1 winner for the Upgrade to Sjora Lucky Draw Promotion. 

You have won 1 pair of KPOP Seventeen Concert Ticket.  Please email your receipt (xxx608 from Pepper Lunch) to ...


C : THANKS GUYS FOR ALL YOUR SUPPORT!!!!
L : No more fast fooooooooood, can we eat other things already?? 
C : ANGEL STILL SAY I NO LUCK =( ****
L : My samsung detected I use Sjora more than Sephora LOLL
M : My life quota for Sjora going max alr
C : I scared of Sjora liao
A : No more Sjora!
W : No more Sjora anymore
H : I drink Sjora until scared
L : I need to do a compilation... Sjora Day 1 to Day idk... 
C : We can still eat to win more tickets
J : How about no. I going diabetes DIE BEE TEES.
C : HI-TOUCH. OMG I GONNA FALL IN FRONT OF SCOUPS and hold him....
Everyone else : ......... 

HAHAHAHAHA. Yay Hi-Touch! Was feeling bad because Chanel didn't manage
to win Hi-Touch previously at Bangkok DE. This time she finally have a chance!!

**** End up it was MY Pepper Lunch meal receipt
that won her the tickets 好吗?



I also really wanna thank Harris Ho for ordering Sjora even though he doesn't drink Sjora!

Mega big THANK YOU to everyone who took part and helped !!

29 September, 2017 | DE SINGAPORE !!

Airport Arrival Day...

We stood directly behind the barricades while Chanel held my Jeonghan + her Scoups fanboard while I'm became the "Jeongcheol' videographer. Scoups legit saw his fanboard and waved to Chanel. When I moved my camera towards Jeonghan, he was already looking at my direction! He had this eye smile going on and waving as if he remembers us from Bangkok and Jakarta (or the fanboard :x )



It felt to me that he saw his fanboard from afar and even though I was filming Scoups, he was waiting for me to notice him ❤

We also went to their hotel hoping to see them, they had a total of 3 vans, 1 for the staffs and 2 for them. They stayed at The InterContinental Hotel near Bugis and it's weird that there were no other fans around at all! We went home after awhile because we had work the next day. Sigh, life of a working adult.


♫ CONCERT DAY ♫



We were in the first 30+ in line and got the BEST SPOT in the standing zone! Unlike Bangkok and Jakarta's stage, the stage for Singapore DE didn't have a 2nd level which means all performances were a step closer to us :D

A JH fansite nim talked to me asking if I'm Japanese or Korean while she thought Chanel was Japanese. Chanel still step one Japanese and speak in Japanese so xiasuay walao kill me pls. I didn't know who she was until Cherubim Unnie (Cherubim_YJH) told me it was Affection nim (not sure) but I didn't know she was Japanese? She was kind,and polite too.

Then another group of k-fansites came in and pushed their way to the center. The difference in Japan and Korea fansites ugh! Cherubim Unnie told me there's rabbit and Scoups FS but I didn't know their faces so whatever as long as we don't cross paths...

Halfway through a performance a security pounced and caught a (hoshi?) fansite taking photos with her DSLR (cameras not allowed but phone cameras are fine) , she was right behind me and the fight was F I E R C E. She tried to escape but the guard grabbed her camera and some tug of war drama,,,,  she looked like she was going to cry too damnn! After that another guard came to escort her out. Damn...she was friendly, looked like a Thailand fan... Before that, I helped cover her camera for her to take her pictures when performance team came out and she thanked me too. The guard was our friend too, but work is work and she was doing her job so I can't say anything either D; *Feels bad*

Cherubim Unnie almost got caught too but she hid her camera before the guard came *phew* I was praying so hard for her not to get caught because she's a Jeonghan Stan and she was just behind Chanel, her spot was even better than other fansites! I kept her covered with my fanboard and gave her space to sneak some snaps of my Jeonghan.

After the concert I was sent some HQ JH pictures from Cherubim without watermark after the concert as thanks. Really grateful and it's now my wallpaper. Some of her FS friends got caught during bag check and they ended up splitting their camera (1 bring in lens, another bring in body) in order to take pictures.

Only now, I realized that being a fansite photographer is not easy!! Another FS got caught halfway and the security demanded for their memory card. Damn the stress level is no joke.

Appreciation photo -

During the start of the final talk stage, I took out a paper that wrote "Happy Early Birthday" in Korean and showed it to JH! He didn't expect it because he paused for a moment to read it and laughed out loud :D :D :D

Then I showed him another paper that wrote "Noona will always support you!" and he nodded and smiled so cutely oh gosh.. Someone's in a good mood today.

Videos and Snaps! -

Jeongcheol aimed their camera to our area! They purposely met up, walked to our side, looked back to check if their angle was right to video us!! I JUST KNOW IT. DON'T DOUBT ME D; Watch their Vlive and you'll be able to see us. 

Actually, you'd be able to see us in their vlive for ALL the concerts that we went to oops.

To be continued






Sunday, 12 August 2018

Expectations Vs Reality

Just. In. A. Mood. To. Rant.

Love is to me not letting anyone bad mouth you or letting the one you love get the shorter end of the stick. (Instead of laughing along with others or turning a blind eye saying its none of your business.) Love to me is to make sacrifices for the person you love to be happy, because you don't want them to feel sad. Love to me is also not by using money, gifts and superficial means, instead, love to me is honest and straight forward like how we're like when we were kids, love is endless giving through words, attentiveness and thoughtfulness, love is never having to guess or ask for it. Love is being able to give 100% of my love and to be able to receive 120% back in return in order to keep the fire burning. The only fight I want in a relationship should only be fighting to show who loves who more.

"What can I do more to make her happy?"... "A wife should be doted on, whatever my wife says goes."... "In this entire lifetime, there's not even enough time for me to look at you, so why would i waste my time looking at others?" Attentive, doting, dependable, giving you a sense of security, trustworthy, thoughtful, affectionate, kind, honest, reliable, there for you when you need him (even when it's inconvenient), growth oriented (a guy who won't say it's your problem and this is the way he is and you need to deal with it). Someone that gives you emotional support when you had a rough day instead of giving you a matter of fact advice that might be useful but hurtful to you when he doesn't empathize with what you're going through or make you feel better.

Love to me is, even when the whole world was to go against you, I will fight against the whole world for you. Love to me is, if you are able to make me feel like your queen, I will do whatever it takes to make you a king.

My expectations are so high i'm never gonna get married Uwuuuu. LOL Just kidding. Can I just transverse into novel world or anime world. Been reading so many time travel novels these days, mostly about fighting and martial arts and hellawesome mecha fights! BUT the MLs are still husband material (even though it's not a pure romance novel) 

Men like that only appears in novels though.... or giving a benefit of doubt, maybe 0.01% in the entire universe...(#aka aliens) ._.

HAH. Goodbye.

Tuesday, 19 June 2018

A Low Quality Love is Inferior to a High Quality Solitude




Reading a huge amount of C-novels these days and its affecting my already non-existent social life.
Not that I mind.


Completed reading - Full Marks Hidden Marriage: Pick Up a Son, Get a Free Husband (许你万丈光芒好)

Currently reading - Ghost Emperor Wild Wife (鬼帝狂妻:纨绔大小姐) & Adorable Food Goddess (萌妻食神)

Love strong female leads + cold and aloof but behind-the-scene loyal and affectionate (Tsundere) male leads! 

And also like Tsunderes with a bit of child-like/innocent personality, those that gets overly protective and jealous easily when their MC gets 'stolen' by someone else, and makes a fuss about it. Those kinds are sooooooooo cute!! 

Men like that are everywhere in mangas and novels but not in real life, why??? Tchh.

Saturday, 16 June 2018

Narcissism, Manners and Etiquette


PMS days just makes me feel like shit. Why do people like to make fun of others knowledge and look down on others? Unfortunately, I'm feeling down today and need to release some pent up frustrations. Thank god I have a place to vent.

Was eating dinner yesterday when suddenly a subject popped up in the conversation and someone just said my head looks big and for some reason it was linked to a big head having a big brain but,,,,, why am I still so stupid? ... Here I am minding my own business eating my food and this happens.

'Supposedly' having a bigger brain is smarter So they tried to "prove it" by asking me math questions (I'm bad at math). Wow. Some people are just shit. *Roll eyes*

Did you know? : A big brain alone doesn't equate with smarts. If it did, elephants and sperm whales would win all the spelling bees. Rather, scientists look at brain mass relative to body mass in order to make any speculation about a creature's cognitive abilities....

....Sigh, sometimes I question who really are the idiotic ones. 

Empty vessels really makes the most noise... Don't blow your own horn unless you have what it takes ok? 

Tbh, I felt kinda hurt because of the sudden verbal abuse (due to pms) but 君子不計小人過 so instead of flaring up and replied lamely by saying math is not really important because we can't communicate in math. So why is being bad at math = stupid? We communicate in English, how about a 1 + 1 = Fuck you 2 / too?

Why are you calling me stupid with a smug better-in-math-than-you face?
I don't understand why was I attacked for no reason either. Your point?
What's your objective? To indulge in your own ego? 
To come across as “above others” or "obnoxious"?

Truth is, what I really wanted to say was at least I don't down on others that aren't academic smart and constantly condemn others. The amount of schadenfreude is disappointing.  

I guess "narcissism on the rise" is really true and belittling others to inflate their ego, play the classic “I hate drama” card and "I'll just apologize to stop this pointless argument because I cant never win your "logic" and in the end make the wronged person look bad as the main goal in mind.

“Some people try to be tall by cutting off the heads of others.”  

Honestly, who are you to say I'm stupid when some people can't even write a grammatically correct sentence. Not remembering lefts and right? Or differentiating her, him, he or she? We speak and read in English, not Math. We don't practice Math everyday but converse with English daily. The definition of stupid is said to be showing poor judgement or little intelligence, so who's to say I'm stupid if that's the case? Personally, I feel that one shouldn't act smart or show off because it becomes a double edge sword when you're wrong, making you look stupid instead. 

And all that bullshit ' treasure our relationship' and 'angel's logic' when you can't make a stand or state your point in an argument only to give up halfway. Are you like 5? At least 5 years old nowadays knows not to hurt people with words and giving pointless remarks just to make themselves look good...

Some people need to re-learn the concept of good manners the rules of etiquette to know how to be respectful and considerate of other people's feelings. Why am I getting hurt emotionally by the people I least expect?!!!! I need to grow up and harden my heart. 

Don't be that bad guy in novels that everyone loves to hate. 

有时候觉得自己一个人是否比较好,至少没有人能伤你的心。
我也不用认为了解你,但事实上是最不懂你心的人。


Where is my Yun Xiao or Lu Ting Xiao that will speak up for me when I'm getting bullied or made fun off? :(

- angelseah

Wednesday, 2 May 2018

SEVENTEEN DIAMOND EDGE EXPERIENCE JAKARTA ˉ̡̠̭̭”( ⑉¯ །། ¯⑉ )ˉ̡̠̭̭


Seventeen has the best reactions. Especially Mingyu. 
But I'm Hoshi.

23 September 2017 | DE JAKARTA 
#Throwbackpost #anotherlongpost

#jeonghanbiasedblogpost


Took the morning flight to Jakarta and saw a rainbow mid flight. Did you know a rainbow looks like this from the top? Tried to take a video of it but it didn't do justice to it, it's way prettier real life!

Met CherubiYJH (Jeonghan biased) for the first time and received a bunch of Jeonghan stuff that she made for giveaways. She looks like Hong Jin-Kyung, the funny tall one in Unnies Slam Dunk. Up till now, I still don't know her actual name LOL (っ- ‸ – ς)


정말 감사합니다 UNNIE !!

Took an Uber to our hotel and we went to collect our tickets after checking-in. I assumed we'd be able to simply show our order payment via phone's email and didn't print the emailed copy. Turns out... the staffs needed a physical copy -____-  Luckily, we managed to get our tickets after going back and forth + doing extra paperwork and hogging the queue damn burden.

FOOD TRUCKS were available in the waiting area, it's so cool because Singapore doesn't have stuff like that. Chanel was unimpressed with my fascinated expression though... Hehh. End note, we queued for 6 effing hours!!! (; ̄д ̄ .... Wtf.

Some local carats talked to us asking where we were from. They were hilarious and despite our language barrier we managed to communicate with korengish and followed each other on Instagram ;) Seventeen was having their rehearsal next door and everyone started singing along to their music, shouting fan chants and getting hyped. It was really nice meeting these lovely ladies and I hope we'd be able to see all of them in future SVT events!

Group photo ♥ ◡ ♥


 (๑˃́ꇴ˂̀๑) 


Start of Diamond Edge World Tour in Jakarta 

Scoups came out from his usual place (right side of stage) while Chanel stuck out her fanboard waving it at him. He recognized her board and pointed straight toward us and waved happily. We were fangirling like "Omgiashu I think he remembered our board."


Scoups gave her another heart stopping fan-service during Mansae stage. He'd look straight ahead normally but this time he totally angled himself towards us! I was standing behind Chanel and took this for her (You're Welcome) His killer smile and tongue action, SO CUTE yet SO RUDE. The power of Choi Seung Cheol for real. Say what you may but a specially made fan board of Scoups with hot pink hair sticking out in the middle of the crowd is pretty hard to ignore #DelusionalOrNOT┌(▀Ĺ̯ ▀-͠ )┐

The pushing was helluva crazy! I heard people were fainting while some fell due to the extreme pushing. After the concert, Chanel says she's never ever going back there again LOL. My abs ached for a few days after that too -.-

Halfway though the concert SVT Staffs started giving fans packet water!! Like a gift from the heavens, a rainfall in a drought. ლ(ٱ٥ٱლ) I was extremely touched by Svt staffs, Seventeen cares for Carats and their staffs do the same. #fandomGoals.. Despite the many concerts I've been to, this is the first time staffs handed out free drinks during a concert. 


End-Ment !!



The reason Mingyu smirked and Scoups turned away smiling was because after Scoups did his signature sexy tongue out move and looked at Chanel, SHE FUCKING COPIED HIS TONGUE LICKING LIP ACTION RIGHT IN FRONT OF HIM with a flirty/smirking Look! Both of them saw it and hence the "LOL WHAT-IS-THIS-GIRL-DOING SMILE/SMIRK IDK-HOW-TO-REACT LOOK" I'm proud of my bff. Bet she's the only one can do this without any reservations whatsoever. #SuperShameless LOL


Jeonghan seemed unwell. He was great nevertheless, acting cute and smiley throughout. During end-ment my poor baby's flu worsen, his eyes were watery and a little bit reddish. I saw him staring into space with his mouth opened, keeping his eyes closed and using his mouth to breath. He even wiped his nose on his sleeves a few times Lol. Despite all, he still smiled and nodded to his fans. There was a moment he was stoned for so long I thought my phone hanged (ó﹏ò。)


Bff asked Scoups whether Jeonghan was feeling alright 
"정한이 괜찮아요? 어디아파요??" 
Scoups just looked at Jeonghan and they didn't talked much.

But, Jeonghan fan-service is still No. #1.. 


Saw his eyes shifted and at the very moment his eyes met mine, his strong and unwavering gaze pierced through my soul, stealing my breath away as I stared unfaltering back, wondering what's going through his mind. Hesitatingly I followed up with a nod as we smiled at each other at the same time. A smile and eyes which conveyed this feeling, saying "Thank you for liking me." A smile same as my fanboard, the smile that I love.

"A smile is not genuine unless the eyes smile too, 
and words mean nothing unless the eyes speak them too."


And perhaps, to him, this wasn't enough to enrapture my entire being, he made a heart out of confetti making sure I saw his "Love" before looking away with an unmistakably pleased smile. Whist nearly dropping my phone, I thought, "Is this for real? This boy is not good for my heart."

Sad to say this is all but a sad half written fairytale...


Get more rest Yoon Jeonghan. Thank you for giving me an experience to remember. Take care, eat plenty, hope you look better when I see you in SG. Gonna to be the FIRST to wish you Happy Birthday! Just you wait ;)

Rare Gyuhan Moment

   

“Dream as if you’ll live forever, live as if you’ll die tomorrow”.

   

*All Diamond Edge gifs / pics are taken by me. Please re-upload with credit*

Bye Bye!