Summer Birthday

Chalet ☑ Cake ☐ BBQ ☐

 Venue | Costa Sands Pasir Ris Chalet | Start | 6 pm | Theme | deciding | Dinner | 6 pm | Cake Cutting | 11pm | Midnight Movie | Bowling | 12pm | Supper | 3 pm

Gonna be 21 in less than 3 weeks.. can't say I'm excited but rather hopeful that everything will go well on that day. Have to learn to be less angsty these days to not ruin every happy celebration :|
 

I want to take this time to thank all the people who have helped me in my life, no amount of thank you(s) are enough to express my gratefulness. My family, love and friends, those who stayed and left...that made be believe that there are somethings worth living for ❤

 

Sincerly, angelseah

I hate this evil place

I hate certain people sometimes, acting all big shot and mature.... while treating you like a kid, saying how they know everything in a boastful manner. No one bothered to ask what I'm thinking and start to judge, all they think is I'm angry I don't listen to explanations & I don't put myself in another's shoes. 

Especially that judgement talk came from the one I cherish most. It's upsetting. I'm learning not to talk so much, since they don't get it. Then I give up.

Right now, you are only liking the things I can give, not for who I am, nor what I like. I didn't know you think of me as such of an unreasonable person. Always listening to you friends instead. If happiness instead means to feel so much hurt, then I've given up being happy. Because no amount of happiness can make me feel less hurt then I already am. My heart is crying but no one knows.

You know what's the best ways to avoid affection. Don't talk. Then you won't miss anyone. The world is so big, I am just a small human that wouldn't make a difference anyway. 

 
irony,
angelseah.

Life, A Passing Parade

B I G   H A P P Y   B I R T H D A Y

K E N N E T H  & Z H O N G P I N G

18th May 2013. A Hectic day

Hair dyed to copper red wasn't pleasant, chemical burn.

But hey, no pain no gain yes?

Ever felt that in society, there's just one too many ungrateful people. In life, we tend to expect what we give is what we should get in return. Appreciation, the most important basic rule that many has forgotten... which caused a situation of a letdown.

Words that are said can never be taken back, those vitriolic words that makes one sad. Miscommunication is an inconvenience, but also an excuse. Thousands and hundreds of ways to restructure a sentence, yet you choose to misuse. Don't know what kind of impact they're leaving here, so harsh, and unforgettable.

I know it takes both hands to clap, but it's only wrong to get angry & say spiteful words when you're the one at fault. I'm just really really really sick and tired of people that thinks they are all mature, saying to comprehend both sides of the story but already judging me. Sigh, let bygones be bygones..

Went home early because i felt the awkwardness in the room when i arrived. &no, i don't want that & i think you'll be happier without me there. Kinda glad to get to see you again, not when i just left like that. I'm a coward.

Why are there so many problems in life?!

Where's my once upon a time.. :l

angelseah -*

4 + 1 theory - by Zachary Liu

True love or fickle infatuation.

Based on this idea that whenever we like someone, we go deeper into what is it that draws us to him or her. However that's merely an infatuation. But when more than three of the aspects from this theory are present, you can be pretty sure that it’s more than just a feeling. 

Mind. Heart. Body. Soul.

1. The Mind Aspect, Intellect

The way she thinks, processes and analyzes things beyond a shallow self-centeredness. The way she puts across thoughts not for winning an argument’s sake, but to understand or even sensibly debate opposing views that might leave anyone reflecting on her words or make one think differently. 

It’s the way she carries herself off with an aura of sophistication and enigmatic charm, that no matter how much I might already figure her out, she’ll still surprise you with something unexpected. And to talk endlessly about the concept of nothing, only then will you be able to talk about everything else.

2. The Heart Aspect

What really matters to her, her insecurities, fears, likes, dislikes, everything. To understand each other’s heart and learn to accommodate each other’s differences not ‘because I love him and that’s all that matters’. But to care or find out the little things about you. It’s not a matter of whether it bores him or not.. it’s a matter of whether he bothers or not.

Two people need to give and take, for any kind of relationship to work. If he really loves you and you're important to him, he'd take a greater effort to close the gap in differences between you two.

He’ll show it by the things he will do or be willing to do no matter how inconvenient or silly it might be, just because he knows it’ll make you happier or better. Two people wanting to understand each other.. sharing the good, the bad and possibly a future together; supporting each other’s feelings, values, dreams, thoughts and emotions.

3. The Body Aspect, Physical Attraction; Intimacy and Presence

I think the whole love at first sight concept is bullshit that only exists in movies and fairy tales. In reality, it isn't love but probably lust at first sight. Lust at first sight, that momentary attraction or desire– That’s really just a superficial physical attraction. 

Which leads to

4. The Fourth Aspect. Soul

The deepest form and the final affirmation that should answer any remaining doubt or questions as to whether we've truly fallen in love with a person.

It’s when you start noticing but still appreciate all the other little things - the flaws. It’s when you truly know a person stripped down of all their walls, exposed to their soul and yet still accept and love him or her. 

A level of understanding and acceptance, when you finally realize this is someone that you'll always want to tell everything to; and want to ask/know everything of as well. 

It’s when you actually want to share your life and trust your secrets with this person; and you can. This person cares and will really listen, giving you their undivided attention and genuine love; This one person makes your problem their problem and they go through it together with you just so you don’t have to go through the pain and tears alone.

❤

We often and will find one or two aspects in different people, that alone may be enough to make us attracted to them. That is not love, it's just liking the body and/or mind aspect of a person.

But on a rare occasion when you do meet someone who possess all four of these aspects. You’ll almost definitely know that he/she is not one of many but may just be the one.

So don't settle for anything less.

my kind of guy

1. Do you need him to be good looking?  - Nope. It's my personal preference.
2. Smart? - Yes! Intellectual debates and sweet words to humor me.
3. Preferred age?  - 5 year older to 5 years younger, acceptable.
4. Preferred height?  -  Same / Taller than me. (I'm 165cm)
5. How about sense of humor?  - Everyone likes a funny guy.
6. How about piercings? - Sexy
7. Accepts you for who you are?  - Obviously!
8. Pink hair?  - If he can pull it off?
9. Mushy or no?  - like it.
10. Thin or fat?  - Fit / Slim.. But not buff. 
11. Black, Brown or White (skin colour)? - Fair or tanned is fine.
12. Long hair or short hair? - Whichever looks good on him
13. Inked? - HOT. But not too much.
14. Smells good? - It's important.
15. Smoker? - No. I don't smoke.
16. Drinker? - Knows when to stop.
17. Girl/Boy-next-door type?  - Yes! I like good boys.
18. Plays bass and/or acoustic guitar? - A Bonus!
19. Romantic? - Love it
20. Singer or dancer? - Bonus.
21. Vain? - Slightly vain is good.
22. With glasses? - Yes please. Love guys with specs!
23. With braces? - It's fine.
24. Shy type?  - Not too shy or it'd be awkward (Because I'm shy)
25. Rebel or good boy/girl?  - Mixture of both (Lol)
26. Active or passive? - Active.
27. Stunner? - Great. But i'll be jealous so maybe not...
28. Mr count-my-crush-until-you-drop?  - Flirt? No!
29. Dimples? - Cute!
30. Bookworm? - Reading is good. I like to read too.
31. Mr. love letter? - I'll appreciate.
32. Playful? - Yes!
33. A Flirt? - & I'll show him how the game is played.
34. Poem writer? - Can't appreciate.
35. Gamer? - Why not?
36. Adventurous? - A must!
37. Someone who likes to tease people? - Jokingly, yes. Upset people = No.
38. Loyal or faithful ? - Both is a must.
39. Good kisser? - Hot.
40. Loves kids? - Must.

Goodday
angelseahx3\

Thoughts

Do you ever just want to pack up and leave out of the blue without saying anything to anyone and just leave to start a life anew? Sick and tired of expecting change, knowing that things will always be the same.

 

Project Executive's work is tough, I do want to persevere and make the best out of this learning process of life. But just how can I do my best when there's nothing for me to hang on to; & the saddest part is people don't know how I truly feel, masked behind this act of phony.

 

Gonna try working for 1 more month,

at best, 7 more months. Who knows?

Hopefully things will get better.

 

I need a long break from this madness. I want to do something cracracrazyyy, to spice up thy life. Like bungee jumping, skydiving, shark diving, paranormal investigating, learning biking, parkour, I need that adrenaline rush.

 

Cheers,

angelseah